I was discussing this with petertodd a couple days ago and we were thinking the sequence I sent yesterday was usable today. I tried getting it to work on test-net but the final transaction closing the channel was not being accepted into the mempool beacause "ERROR: CTxMemPool::accept() : inputs already spent"
But I was talking with sipa and gmaxwell on IRC about it, and sipa reminded me; Test-Net implements IsStandard() to allow the non-final "refund" TX into the mempool, but then doesn't allow it to be replaced, Main-Net implements IsStandard() to *reject* non-final transactions in the first place.
Therefore, this actually will work on Main-Net today, since the refund TX won't even be allowed into the mempool until it's final, the AP is free to sign and broadcast its final TX without any replacement. Of course, if the AP waits too long, the user can get their Refund into the mempool and the AP's [higher seq] version will be locked out.
This may be a case where Test-Net is in a "bad" state, by allowing non-final TXs into the pool, but not allowing replacement, you get an intermediate state which neither matches Main-Net behavior, nor implements behavior which would ever be deployed to Main-Net as-is.
The current Main-Net behavior is actually very well suited for this application. Any application that can be reduced to two instances of a Tx, namely one non-final, and one final which is updated internally between the parties, works very well under the current Main-Net rules.
If you set the nLockTime of the refund to be several days after the scheduled closing time of the channel, it would be quite challenging to get the Refund TX into the blockchain *despite* a final broadcast TX from the AP. Since the vast majority of Main-Net won't even accept it, the attacker would have to distribute the TX to any miner who could include the AP's transaction in a block between now and when the refund becomes final, and convince them all to not include the perfectly valid, fees paid, final, nSeq=MAX, nLockTime=0 transaction from the AP. Demonstrating that level of coordination would act substantially against the best interests of the miners, to say the least.
This proposal still suffers from any malleability weakness, where the user's refund could be invalidated by a miner changing the TxID of TX1.